Sunday, May 1, 2016

Nocturnal Overthinking



4am, in bed, insomniac.

Trying to shake off this song stuck in my head... I'm thirsty. I need to pee. I wonder if the toilet can wait. Or, in this case, my bladder. Oh, there's a bassline I have to remember tomorrow - where's my notepad? So many things to do, so little time. Oh, hello, anxiety. This pillow is playing games with me... Is it so hard to find a comfortable position?! My neck hurts. Do I really need to go to the toilet? False alarm. When will I die? And how? And why? Do people ever get their heads flooded with these sour thoughts when they can't sleep? Sure, it can't be just me. I need to turn off the bloody heater, it's roasting. I miss home... But where is home? Deep. That Pinterest moodboard is exquisite. How many hours until sunrise? Let me check if I set up the alarm... Can I reach my glass of water in the dark? Fuck. Maybe I should listen to Chopin, classical always soothes the sleepless. Am I still hungry? My stomach is roaring... I'm still too full though, no wonder I can't fall asleep. One should never pig out before bedtime. Life's too short. Will I ever find true love? I can't believe Keith Richards is still alive - incredible. All I can think of right now is peanut butter and chocolate ice cream... and I don't even like peanut butter... The Universe is doomed... Cosmic complexities... Black holes! I lost one of my socks in the layers of this bed. My feet are cold. Did I remove my mascara?! What the hell was that noise? Should I go downstairs? Nah, can't be bothered. MICHAEL FASSBENDER. What should I wear tomorrow? Brown boots + mustard sweater + blue dress + burgundy hat... *mentally visualisation of my entire wardrobe* Do we actually remember when we were little kids or only the photographs of us instead of the actual memories? Is it morning yet? Humpf. 

8 comments:

  1. This is the most relatable thing ever, especially the Fassbender part! haha xx
    britishmermaid.blogspot.co.uk

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  2. "What should I wear tomorrow" é uma questão que já não
    se põe na minha idade. Fora isso, toda a gente terá uma insónia
    de vez em quando. E sente, e pensa muito. A diferença é que
    ninguém fala geralmente sobre o que sente ou o que pensa
    mas sobre o que é suposto sentir e pensar. Ser verdadeiro
    e falar do que se é, é difícil. Actualmente praticamente ninguém
    o faz. E ser verdadeiro com os outros é geralmente dar pérolas
    a porcos.
    A casa é onde quiseres. Eu estou sempre aqui para ti.
    xx

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  3. Don't even get me started. Lately, this sounds like the story of my nights ahahahaha.
    http://bloglairdutemps.blogspot.pt/

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  4. I was just introduced to this blog and I was blown away!
    I totally relate to this post, I do have anxiety issues too and on top of that I tend to verbalize all those "sour thoughts" just like you, so poor husband of mine. But actually I've been controlling myself a little more.

    All in all, I've just read this post and I'm already in love with the blog. You got yourself a new fan, a Portuguese one! Compatriota!!

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  5. I hear you, sister. The medicine has helped with this. But it's been my everyday for years.

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  6. Ai, que viagem! Relaciono-me com a cena da bexiga e de enfardar antes de dormir e, por mais que essas coisas todas sejam engraçadas de se ler agora, não têm piada nenhuma na altura.

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